Triple Caliphate of Zarmina

Greetings, Earthlings. I have declared myself Hierophant, Thaumaturge, and Reverend General of the planet Zarmina. I have formed the Triple Caliphate of Zarmina to administer the planet on behalf of the Space Brothers (an inexact translation of their true name, more on them later.)
The televison program “Dispatches from Planet Z“, premiering in December on URTV, will be the official news and information service for the Caliphate. It will enlighten the wretches of Earth, lost in their spiritual wilderness.
As the the Reverend General of the Triple Caliphate, I am empowered to make those who desire it citizens of Zarmina. Details on this shall be forthcoming.
The Triple Caliphate of Zarmina is a synthesis of three ancient Earth faiths, each of whom has held a glimmer, however incomplete, of the true religion: The Church of the Subgenius, the Cult of Discordia, and the Moorish Orthodox Church. Litanies, parables, psalms, epistles, fatwas, and slash fanfic to follow shortly.

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